Hi Mike,
Yes some of the top ranking sites are just plain ugly, messy and certainly wouldn't attract me if I were a potential customer.
It's certainly an attainable goal, beating those ugly sites if you spend some time and energy building up your inbound links.
You can have a link exchange directory on your site. You can place a link to it towards the bottom of your site so it's discreet - then make sure you break out the pages by state or something similar so that each page has no more than 50 outgoing links each. I'd suggest running some searches on top phrases like 'atlanta real estate,' 'seattle real estate,' 'miami real estate' and pick some nice ranking, well done websites to request links from.
Check any potential link partner out well - make sure they don't have a robots.txt file hiding their links pages (type in
www.linkpartnersite.com/robots.txt and hit enter, if they're trying to hide those pages from the search engines, the folder or page will be listed)
You can also check to see if their links are 'spiderable' by the search engines with a search engine simulator like
http://tools.summitmedia.co.uk/spider/ If you run the spider check and their link partner URLs don't show up, then they're hiding them.
An interesting side note, I recently spidered a Homes.com site and found that Homes.com had placed some invisible outgoing links to other HOmes.com sites on this persons website - he knew nothing about it. Yikes!
Check to see the difference in PR or Page Rank between their homepage and their link page - you can check the PR with the Google Toolbar. If their homepage is a PR 4 and their link page is a zero - there might be trouble.
If the site itself has a zero page rank, it's either a brand new site or it's been penalized.
As you can imagine, this whole process can get downright tedious after awhile as you also have to regularly check to make sure your link partners are being honest and keeping their links up - not taking them down after a month or two, hoping you won't notice.
If you keep an excel file with all the details on each link partner, it gets a little easier to check for reciprocation. There are some websites that let you check - or you can copy/paste out of your excel file for each one. Some LinkPartners.com sites move the links around - so there may be some hunting.
Good luck! If you build up your inbound links faster than the competition - you'll beat them. This might be a great job for a teen neice or nephiew whose good with computers...over the summer, rather than mowing lawns.