There's a very long thread in the BPO/Foreclosures forum about Stupid MLS comments and BPO order instructions. I know we had a similar thread started here a while ago...thought it would be fun to start up another one. This isn't limited to MLS comments.

The other day I called to show a home. The MLS comments said it was "VACANT, EASY SHOW, ELECTRONIC LOCK BOX. Courtesy Call Requested." OK, fine. I called the office and was told that the house had tenants in it and I couldn't show it that day.

I said to the receptionist "Oh, OK - well you might want to fix the MLS. It says it's vacant."

She said "It IS vacant. They just rented it out for the summer."


Then it's not vacant, is it?

I locked my car keys and MLS key inside the house I had held open that afternoon. It was a 45 minutes in the hot sun, waiting on the front steps for another Realtor to come rescue me - boy, was my face red - both literally and figuratively, afterwards.

My car's transmission went on at the end of my buyer's tour. Had to bum a ride from my new client and I live 25 minutes across town from where we were/he lived.

Answered the phone once when I was finishing a Popsicle - my tongue was frozen and I sounded like I had a stroke or was drunk or something like that.

I showed the wrong house once. It wasn't for sale.

LOL - Artiste, I did that once too - locked not only my keys in the house but the electronic lockbox key in the house. Thank God I had my cell phone in my pocket.

Paceryder - how did you get in? LOL! That's funny!

"Every Lining has a Silver Cloud" I was once in a retail area about 25 miles from the Office; and locked my keys in the car. I called a Broker at a competing Agency nearby for help and Roasmary appeared less than 10 minutes later, gave me the keys to her new Grand Cherokee Jeep and asked only that I drop her off at her Office before I took off in her vehicle and to retrieve an extra set of keys, which consumed at least an hour.

It would have been a "non-event" except I cannot forget her spontaneous graciousness, and I'm glad now that it happened. It's comforting to know that you have Friends you can count on. Never burn bridges with your Competitors. These Buyers ansd Sellers will come and go; but your fellow Brokers are going to be there for the long run. I love my Competition . . . . (well, most of them, anyway).

I only dislike the nasty competition - the ones who are jerks. Everyone else is cool.

About 10 years ago I had clients that made an offer on a home...wasn't a low ball offer by any means but it was certainly not full price and the listing agent wasn't much help in getting information that I had requested.
Anyway, After dropping off the offer at the listing agents office my clients decided that they wanted to look at the home again. The home was a full time residence and the homeowner (single person) was not at home (working)so we took a look.
As were were looking at the home the phone rang...nobody was there so eventually the answering machine came on and the listing agent started talking (we were standing right beside the answering machine)...the listing agent started saying that she had a really, really, low offer and that we were asking for a bunch if items for free and that the selling Realtor (me) was being a total a$$ (a total lie)and that if the cheap buyers didn't want to pay what the seller was asking why did they even look at the home. It gets longer and more complicated from here but my buyers didn't buy this home.
I was the hot shot rookie and the listing agent was a veteran top producer at the time and we have since became friends and still get a laugh about it. One thing I learned is to NEVER leave a detailed message on an answering machine 'cause you never know who is listening to it.

OMG!!!! That's classic!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks Summers - that's like being the proverbial "Fly on the Wall" !

For me, leaving too much information in a message usually results in the call not being returned . . . . so these days, I'm inclined to only leave skeletal messages that include just enough "bait" to get them (anyone) to call back and actually "speak" with me. This allows me to confirm that not only did they get the message . . . . but that they understood the message and will not be "Going off Half-Cocked".

That is a funny story Summer, a real jaw dropper.

Early in my career I returned home from showing another agent's listing and found the key to the house in my shirt pocket. It was dinner time and traffic was still terrible. I returned it, about 35 minutes each way-kicking myself along the way. I think it was at that time I developed the system whereby I leave the key in the lock during showings.

I almost always leave the key in the lock...exception being above example...lol.

BUT THE...then you have a "helpful customer" who takes it out and lays it on the kitchen counter for you, because you "forgot it." Dear God. That happened once and I didn't notice until AFTER I pulled the LOCKED door shut, and said "Where is the key???!!!"

"Oh, I took it out and put it on the kitchen counter so you wouldn't forget it!"

Wasn't THAT helpful??!!! I felt like a maroon (sic) when I called the listing agent to tell them of the mishap!

The only thing Ive done was lock myself in the garage at one of my listing. It had one of those doors that you can open from the inside when its locked but not from the outside. I thought it was unlocked and didn't think twice. It was also one of the doors that closes on its own. After I opened the big garage door I thought I better check all the doors to make sure I'm locked out for good before I call the owner and tell him how stupid I am. Luckily the side door was open and I didn't have to call the owner.

I had a property with a security system in place. I botched it when I entered the code and set off the alarms...this during a showing of course. The siren could be heard for blocks. Most embarrassing.

I ALWAYS keep the key in my HAND while walking around with the clients. I have been locked out before- only once- but once was enough. Luckily my client was cool and climbed in an open window for me.

Once a long time ago I was showing property to a friend in the middle of the day- and one property we looked at had 'call first then use lockbox' instructions- so that's what we did. We got there, I rang the doorbell and knocked (just in case). We went in, the small dog in the back yard was barking its head off the entire time- like at least 5 minutes. We were in the back yard, the entire living area of the house conversating the entire time. So when it came time to enter the master bedroom the door was about half-shut, so I opened it and walked in only to find a guy IN HIS UNDERWEAR SOUND ASLEEP!. We backed out of the room and RAN out of the house. When we got in my car we were laughing so hard we had to sit there for a few minutes so we could both compose ourselves. He didn't buy that house. I am really glad it was someone who was a friend- made the situation much easier.

I walked in on a woman while showing a home I was assured was vacant as the listing agent said the seller was on vacation. Her friend, who was house sitting, was in the bedroom playing with a large "toy" collection. I said sorry, closed the door, and went to find my client. The woman came downstairs laughing her butt off, still half naked. Classic.

Tastefully reported, still funny as heck. Well done. Too many jokes bouncing around the cranial walls. Must resist.....can't help myself....struggling...struggling....

Always try to enter each room prior to your Customers entering . . . . just to make sure that there isn't anything offensive in there. Sac's story reminds me of a situation I've described before, where I failed to do a good job checking out the Basement Rec Room before escorting a Catholic Nun through the House, and the Tenants left one of their Hustler Magazines wide open on a pool table for close examination.
I talked about it in more length over here:

Catholic Nun encounters Hustler Magazine

I once had a College Rooming house For Sale where the Students had continuous feed X-Rated Videos going on the TV while I was showing the place (maybe as a prank ?); but the Customers had College age Kids of their own and had seen all those videos before, so that wasn't nearly as disturbing as the look on that Sister's Face.

I once showed an absolutley beautiful home to a couple, we walked all the way through this 3000 sqft home, looked down and noticed dark foot prints on the near white carpet. I looked at my feet, they were fine, looked at his feet, covered in thick mud!

I once had a short sale listed on a house about 5 years ago that was being lived in by her son and their roommates.

It was a little 3/2 ranch.They had graffiti spray painted with a muriel in the eat in kitchen.

A buyer with another agent toured the home.In one of the rooms the ladies son reads fantasy books.The buyers agent told me the buyer would buy the house but the people their appeared to be witches or devil worshipers.The buyer felt the house would now be possessed by evil spirits! LOL


The book was nothing more than a fantasy book and had nothing to do with witchcraft or a satanic ritual.

IndianaHomes - OMG! That's baaaad!!!!

Super - I truly believe superstition stops a lot of home sales!

I was showing a house and the listing agent was there. He was facing us and had his back to the door of the master bedroom. He pushed it open and still not looking in just smiling and talking he said "here is the master bedroom". There was a guy maybe 5-600 lbs sitting naked on the bed with a woman who had to be pushing 80 years old kneeling in front of him. She was looking at us and he flipped the blanket over his lap. The agent saw our shocked faces and turned around.... fortunately everyone burst out laughing.

I bought a house a few years back. It wasn't listed so I was working with the seller. A newly divorced single mother. I was coming by for a final decision making third showing. She wasn't going to be home and said she would leave the sliding door open. My girlfriend and I came in and looked around. We went into the bedroom and there was about an 8 inch dildo on the bed next to the laptop.

Yes I now own the home.

I had my own house listed a couple years ago and when it expired I got a call from an agent looking for a listing. Although it clearly stated in the agent remarks that the listing agent was the owner, the agent making the phone call clearly had not read it.

He went off about how my current agent (Me) didn't know what he was doing and how he would do a much better job.

I let him talk for a couple minutes and then asked him if he had the old listing in front of him. he said that he did. i asked him to read the confidential remarks. There was a long pause. I asked if he was still there and all that he could say was that he was sorry and hung up.

At first I was mad and then started to laugh.

Any personal property come with the house?

Just air filters that were so packed with dirt that when I accidentally dropped one it didn't even fall off.

These are great stories! LOL!!

P-Town, that would make me laugh too - I once went to an expired listing and met w/ the sellers. I was kind of puffed up over my angle w/ the "ultra wide angle lens" on my camera and said that their current pictures are TERRIBLE, just TERRIBLE and don't show the house in its true light - there was a pause, and we changed the subject to something else...and a few sentences later they told me that their son was the listing agent.

Oy.

call a spade a spade...


i have learned that it is not a good idea to say anything about the past..only focus on the future and show what you will do as opposed to what another does not do and it works.

I had a buyer who wanted a house near the water. An agent in my office had a friends house listed and it had been taken off the market. He said he still wanted to sell it, just take the key and go to the house. The address was 2 Beach Road. I'm driving down tne cross street, see the house, and I think "oops, I was thinking of a different house", but I was new and figured I'd just gotten the owner's name wrong and this was near the beach, so I brought them in and showed it. The door was open! I left my card inside on the stove, to make matters worse! As we were driving to the next house on the same cross street I see "BEACH ROAD" again! It was right on the line between two towns, and they both had a "Beach Road", so we went to the correct house and I showed that, but I kept saying "hurry up! I have to go back and get my card!!" The buyers were laughing, I was laughing! They were driving and on the way back I kept thinking "DRIVE FASTER!!!" Went back to the house and crept in and grabbed my card. Luckily the owner didn't come home in the meantime. I had almost locked the door behind, me, glad I didn't. I related the story in the office, and one of the agents said he once showed the wrong rental, and there were tenants in the house and they didn't know what was going on!

That's awesome. LOL

I had an interior bpo assignment. I kept trying to get a hold of the contact agent to no avail so I just figured I go maybe it had a supra or common lockbox code. When I got there, there was no lockbox. The place looked vacant, deferred maintenance, broken window etc. I went and knocked on several neighbors' doors and asked if it was indeed vacant. No one knew for sure but they hadn't seen anyone there in quite a while.

So, I rang the doorbell, knocked, no answer, checked the door, locked, pushed on a couple of windows, locked, still kept calling the contact agent while I was there, but couldn't get a hold of him. So, I went to the broken window and pushed the blinds aside. I told my husband, who was with me, that the place needed a trash out, but it was weird because it looked like someone had been studying or doing schoolwork at the table by the window and just left it all.

I thought about climbing in the window but thought nah, better try some more to get in touch with the agent. Good thing I didn't enter. The agent finally called me back on my way to the next house. There were tenants living there and they did not want me to disturb them at that time!

TRUE STORY. Names and location have been changed to protect the dumb and the innocent.

Precursor – Our Provincial Association will publish results of case files that have gone before it with regards contraventions of the Real Estate Act. Names, dates, scenario and judgment are fully published so this is a summary of one of those cases. I only say this to make sure everyone knows that no private information is being shared here that has not already been published.

Joe Lister received a phone call one day from Bob Realtor asking to book a showing on one of Joe Lister’s listings. This particular house was vacant so Bob Realtor received lockbox info and instructions on how to get into the property. Joe Lister never bothered to call Mark Owner, who lived only a few blocks over from his property, to inform him of the showing that evening because it was vacant and Mark Owner requested not to be told of every showing.

Later on that evening Mark Owner decided to go to his property and change a few light bulbs in the house. When he arrived at the property he noticed a car in the driveway. Assuming it was a Realtor doing a showing and not wanting to bother them, he decided to just place the lights inside the house and come back tomorrow when the house wasn’t being shown.
When he opened the door to place the items inside he heard some faint screaming bumping and tumbling around coming from the upstairs bedroom. Scared and not knowing if it really was a showing or not he decided to leave the house and call 911 reporting a CURRENT break in. Needless to say cops live a ‘crime in progress’ type call and police were dispatched immediately.
At this point Bob Realtor and his 21 year old blond “client” noticed that they were discovered. Within minutes (according to Mark Owner) a half dressed blond girl bolted out the back door proceeding to run away from the property while Bob Realtor came out the front and headed to his car. Mark Owner, who at this point realized what was going on, proceeded to yell at Bob Realtor while calling Joe Lister.

As Bob Realtor was pulling out of the driveway in his attempt at a fast get away 4 squad cars pulled in from both sides, sirens blazing, lights flashing, and blocked all escape with guns drawn. Needless to say it was quite the scene for all the neighbors to see.

Poor Joe Lister continued to receive an earful from Mark Owner, who was understandably upset, and was very ashamed at what he was unknowingly a part of. In hindsight, after the house was sold, the client made happy, and the finding of no guilt or wrong doing on Joe Lister’s part, it is all pretty funny but at the time, and during the investigation part, Joe Lister was very….stressed.

True story!!!

So did the Blonde Client ever get the other 50% of her clothes ?

ha ha...lol. That is a good question....I guess Joe Lister was too pre-occupied with putting out fires to notice. I would assume she was carrying them...just never had them on fully. lol