Tired of overzealous "Barney Fife" home inspectors

Ok so, this may turn into a small "vent" but..what I wanted to discuss is the dreaded overzealous Barney Fife home inspector trying to pass off his ridiculousness as professionalism. I understand there is a line of being thorough, but understand that just beyond that line is the land of ridiculousness.

Since "ridiculousness" is sort of subjective, let me talk specifics and see if anyone is with me on a couple of points.

1. Additional commentary overstating the obvious. If a home is 30 years old, and the buyers have personally seen the home at least two times, then of course they know the appliances are 30 years old. It's insanely obvious. To include additional commentary such as, "Presently the kitchen appliance are operating sufficiently, however older models. Continue to observe." is just silly.

My commentary on that commentary: The inspector, being a senior citizen that he is, I would not tell my grandmother that he's old and may croak should she come to me asking for relationship advice concerning a senior citizen love interest. Obviously he's old, but is it necessary to throw that out there in a report? He doesn’t have a pacemaker, right? Not walking with a limp? We get it – he’s old. Should I give my grandmother a picture of a croaked senior citizen in a casket who is the man's same age just so she has a visual of what death looks like? In and of itself, that one statement is not so bad, but adding 13 pages with that type commentary over and over to a first time home buyer simply creates even more unnecessary emotional drama for the buyers. Adding to that, every time something negative is mentioned, it plants yet another seed of doubt in the buyers mind. If the freaking appliance is NOT IN WORKING ORDER, then let me know that. Otherwise, shut up and get on with the inspection. I really believe these inspectors get ridiculous just to sort of wow the buyers into thinking they are really looking out for them. Give me a break! I explain to my sellers to NEVER use that kind of inspector, not even on a home purchase. I never ever reward bad behavior.

2. Are pictures of a nickel sized stain on the cook top really necessary? It's one of those smooth cook tops and anyone knows that if you have some spillage when cooking, you've got to use that special glass cleaner to get it off. No big deal. They were out of it come day of inspection. But now we've got a big 2 inch by 2 inch color photograph of this stain in a report, side by side with other stupidly small cosmetic mug shots.

Check this one out: "Presently the HVAC system is operating sufficiently, correlation with the thermostat is operable, satisfactory air flow; inquire if the system has been serviced within the past year, if not I recommend service by a certified HVAC company for a thorough evaluation. Preventative maintenance." Ok, he should stop right at air flow. No, he can't do that, he's got to plant yet another seed of doubt and imply that it hasn't been checked within a year, and then follow it up with "scare words" such as "recommend service" "thorough evaluation." And why the freak follow that up with "preventative maintenance?" IT'S WORKING, Einstein. Enough said.

Is mention of a 1 inch piece of shoe molding with one finish nail in it, that got pulled just slightly from the wall when the refrigerator was being removed really necessary as well? I mean, kick it with your shoe and problem solved, Bob Vila. Include it in the report along with a photo? Seriously?

And has anyone ever dealt with a home inspector who doesn't leave screws out from wall plates, paint chips/scrapings on the floor all over the home? Now we've got to hear it from the seller that the inspector made a mess and didn't clean up after himself. If you are this type guy, just because you keep your house a mess, doesn't mean it's cool to make a mess of my seller's house.

I wish home inspectors would quit with that silly little game of --> let me put every last little cosmetic detail in the report to make it as long as I can so the buyer will think he/she really got his money's worth and that I'm really looking out for them. There's no wisdom in that. Just take a look at the end result.

Many buyers like little details in reports. I am sure Aunt Bea would like it. If it was me, I suppose I would use the comments to "sell" the buyer on how thorough the report is, emphasize that no material problems were found, and get on with closing. You can always not hire this inspector in the future, or tell the inspection company to send out someone else.

If the buyer called you two years later to ask why the appliances broke or why the HVAC system is not working even though he never had it serviced, wouldn't it be great to say, "You know we talked about those things before you bought. In fact these things were mentioned in the inspection report that you read and signed."

Maybe I am a softy -- I would never pick on good old Barney Fife. I suppose I could ask that Howard Sprague be sent out next time. Definitely not Emmett Clark or Ernest T. Bass.

The inspector is just applying a liberal dose of good old CYA. Barney is just trying to nip it in the bud!

I hear you guys. I did say those two comments alone were no big deal but 13 pages of that type thing over and over... there is a line of ridiculousness.

This is about being reasonable. I don't think a reasonable buyer will call me up 2 years later on a home purchase where they knew the home and the appliances were 30 years old, and were shocked at why the appliances were now failing...I just don't see that happening. It's old. Enough said. Does it work right now? Yep. It's just common sense that there's not a whole lot of life left in the appliances. They don't need to be told all of that extra commentary.

Problem is, I'm not dealing with the buyer - just the seller. I have no clue what the selling agent is/is not telling the buyers. It's not part of human nature to focus on the good in the report, they are only going to focus on the bad, and unfortunately, there are a lot of ridiculous "bad" unnecessary things in the report.

Again, this isn't about being thorough, this is about crossing the line into the land of ridiculousness.

I do try to put myself in the home inspector's shoes though. It's not going to save my behind one bit to overstate the obvious and take pictures of silly little stains and such, making what should have been a 4 page report into a 13 page report. It's just "filler" to make the buyer's think they got their money's worth.

This type of report is not typical. Just tell your seller that the inspector is a little odd and emphasize that the report confirms that the home has no significant problems.

Did you know that Barney Fife was a part time real estate agent on tv? He was trying to get Andy and another guy to sell their houses to each other and got upset when the kids started telling the adults things that were wrong with the houses that the adults did not mention.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0512442/

Some inspectors split their report into a section of "Need to know" and a section of "Nice to Know".

Needs are things that require immediate attention

Nice is some history (as best it can be portrayed) and some information on age of appliances, etc.

There are plenty of home inspecors who like to portray themselves as "Deal Killers" . They don't care - they get paid up front.

My seller vented at me, profanity and all, and I'm ok with that. I'd rather her take her frustrations out on me than on the buyer or anyone else we need to keep appeased. She did calm down. I just hate that both buyer and seller have to endure the emotional roller coaster involved in buying/selling, and the Barney Fife inspectors exacerbate it all in the name of professionalism.

The problem is not in keeping my seller calm. I have that under wraps. The problem is Lord knows what that goofy selling agent is doing... I mean...she is the one who picked Barny Fife Inspections - not the buyer.


LOL! No I did not know that, but that's funny though. I got that comparison from an attorney. I got hit with jury duty a few months ago so I did my time at the court house. There was this crafty expensive attorney who was trying to reduce the damage to this golf pro who was in court for a DUI.

The attorney began his whole speech with a comparison of the police officer to Barney Fife, saying he was overzealous. Well, the attorney was a charismatic guy, got a lot of laughs out of the jury, and sure enough, he got the sentence reduced for his client.

Although I don't think that police officer was being overzealous in that case, I do think the inspector is overzealous in my case. Just because he can't find any material or structural issues, doesn't mean it's cool to add "filler" in the report to bring out the total number of pages to some high number, and try to come out smelling like "the protector." I just ask all parties to be reasonable and stop scaring the fish!

What I love is a home inspector who claims to be educated on mold comments that there is possible mold on the basement walls...when in fact, it was some spatter from a sloppy spackle job.

Exactly. That's the type thing I'm talking about. It's just unnecessary commentary and speculation.

I have an investor way of thinking and I know that I don't think like buyers. As agents, we know they don't think like us so we should take that into consideration when picking Barney Fife home inspections, and try to think about how our clients will respond.

Problem is, most of the agents in my town are senior citizens (sorry not meaning to beat them up...my grandmother is a senior citizen) and since they have husbands with pensions and additional retirement, they can afford to make mistakes and lose sales. She's messing up but she's just a sweet old lady. URGH!

Well, I don't pick the inspectors for my clients. I give them three or four names of guys I know. Often they then pick someone who's name was not on my list.

The last thing I want to do is give them just one name and have them use that person, and then have them blame me for recommending him/her if they don't do a good job.

I tell my clients to call all the inspectors and pick the one they like best. That prevents me from getting in hot water over a bad inspection.

What I hate is when they look at a perfectly good roof that is in excellent condition and say "This roof is 13 years old so it will probably have to be replaced in a year or two since a roof will normally last only 15 years."

I just had a geotech engineer come out for a site evaluation (a home located on a hill). Once he was done with the site evaluation
he decided to do an informal home inspection.

Making sure to state the completely obvious fact, which is entirely unrelated to the homes condition that "the home is need of cosmetic updates".

He wanted to do a complete inspection, upstairs and downstairs, the location, the whole ball of wax.

I will not be calling this gentleman again if I can help it.

It is typical for our inspectors to go into the detail you are talking about. We pick our inspectors because they go into such detail. All these little observations let the buyer know the house was thoroughly inspected and it shows them what they can expect in future repairs and maintenance issues.

I have never seen a home inspector make a mess. I would have them come back and clean it up. Our inspectors are as professional as a home inspector can get.

I have never had a deal die because of inspection issues.

You don't mention whether the buyer asked for all of this stuff to be fixed.

So it's typical you say. And you think it's *reasonable* to have an HVAC that's in perfect working order and then follow it up with "recommend service", "thorough evaluation", and "preventative maintenance?" That's not thorough - that's petty, ridiculous, and unsubstantiated speculation.



Buyers need to be presented with facts - not speculation - thorough inspections have no need for speculation. Although Barney Fife home inspectors are not required to be licensed in my State, here is a snippet from ASHI's code:



From what Barney Fife stated in his report, he did everything *but* putting an estimated time of death for the appliances with his unnecessary commentary.

I did a quick google search to turn up some other agents who get what I'm saying, here was one:





You are the exception not the rule. I can't remember a single home inspector not leaving a mess and/or breaking something. It sounds like a stretch to say "our inspectors" as if messy ones don't exist in your utopia, but this exaggeration also reveals something about your opinion.



Never? I'm assuming you've had a considerable number of closings over time. Consider yourself lucky.



It's not so much about what the buyer wants. They are fist time home buyers being led by selling agent Aunt Bea's oh so awesome advice, armed with Barney Fife as her side kick.

Aunt Bea called me at 10 o'clock last night to drop her hard core negotiating plan on my voicemail - no dice - I answered the phone. Yes, she was pushing to have my seller replace the entire roof and for my seller to "meet her halfway" as she put it. Chyeah, my seller paid all of the closing costs requested, paid the $1000 FHA repair cap (usually $500 but ok we'll pay $1000), home is way below market, and we are supposed to meet them half way? Even with raising the price of the home to cover the roof costs leaves them with a home that will appraise and still be far, far under what any home is going for in that subdivision.

There's a strange twist to this story. My seller's neighbor is her cousin and they are both selling their homes at the same time. They are a little competitive and called 2 different brokers to list their homes (we showed up on the same day and at the same time for the listing appointment. He pulled up at the neighbor's house when I pulled up at the other cousin's house). Both he and I are under contract with Aunt Bea as the selling agent (total coincidence). Aunt Bea used my favorite home inspector with her buyers on the neighboring home, she couldn't get them out to do the inspection of my listing when we needed them, so she called her second favorite - Barney Fife to do my seller's inspection - wow lucky me.

Now the two girls are comparing notes on who did what, when, where, why, and how.

We'll see if Aunt Bea will pull this one off. Ball's in her court.

Very annoying but who do you represent?

If I represent a buyer hell yes I want the commentary. If I represent the seller not so much.

On the HVAC, I would ask that the system be inspected at the sellers expense. If I am the sellers agent I would say the system funtions enough said, inspect it but we aint paying for it. A quick simple fix would be a home warrenty.

Inspectors have a job to do. Their job is not to ensure the house sells. Their job is to report the facts good or bad. My thought would be you should be able to anticipate what an inspector is going to report and the seller should not be surprised or shocked when he does.

When a problem occurs the inspector will be pulled into a lawsuit just as quickly as the Realtor. The Realtor is going to blame the inspector. Inspectors know to CYA, report the facts.

Actually this is normal language used by professional home inspectors.





All our inspectors are licensed and handpicked.





I don't understand why you have to make a personal attack against me. Please explain.





20 years worth of closings. But then I don't let little things make me mad and I do what I can to keep my clients from getting upset. No luck involved.





So the buyer is not asking for all this stuff to be fixed and you let yourself and your seller get your panties all up in a wad over something that is not an issue. This combined with your personal attack on me reveals what is probably the root cause for your problem.

Chill out.

Normal language? What is that supposed to mean? I've mentioned something very specific and have given examples of what was said, what is considered speculative according to ASHI code (and Barney Fife is certified ASHI), and how it was unsubstantiated. Thanks for that tip though. What was I thinking? Normal language. Ok. That makes everything fine then.



Explanation: Your bigger issue here is not understanding what a personal attack is. You may not have liked what I said, or how I said it, but not liking what I say doesn't qualify my words as personal attacks. It qualifies you as a delicate flower, and in need of some of your own "chill out" advice. For you to say, "I have never seen a home inspector make a mess. I would have them come back and clean it up. Our inspectors are as professional as a home inspector can get." is clearly an exaggeration. Saying "never" as if it's just so unbelievable that those common occurrences have happened or could happen, and to say "our inspectors are professional" as if they could never make a mess or break something simply because they are "professional" sounds a lot like a utopia. Did it not occur to you that *you* wouldn't be picking the inspector if you were the listing agent and the buyer's agent insisted on one?



Not much for details, are we? Is that 2 closings per year? Omission of that detail makes that statement kind of meaningless.



LOL! Right, yet you *feel* attacked by some random post by some random anonymous guy on some Internet forum for saying you exaggerated and live in a home inspector utopia?



Well that's good. I do too. And when I have to deal with Barney Fife home inspectors it makes it very difficult to do what I can.


As much as you would love to believe the contrary, fact is, there's always at least a little luck when you are running with a claimed record of perfection with several people involved in a real estate transaction. Are you in a luck free utopia as well?




What part of "have my seller replace the entire roof and for my seller to "meet her halfway"" was unclear to you?


Did you say panties?


Bigtoe, why didn't you say that from the very beginning? That's what I was looking for. I'm going to call my seller right now and tell her Bigtoe said this is not an issue. Then I'm going to call Aunt Bea and let her know this is not an issue. Then I'm going to ask her to call the buyer and tell him none of this is an issue. All of our perceived problems are now solved. Maybe I could get the home inspector to make "not an issue" part of his "normal language?"