We have one agent around here who uses crazy acronyms in his adspeak and his MLS listings. Here's a bit from one of my favorites:
“FP, AEK, 2300SF, FDR, W/W, CAC, FROG”

"FROG" got me so I just had to call him. He was quite amazed that I didn't know that meant "Finished Room Over Garage".

Guess I'm not the sharpest tool in the shed.

Here, dinosaur agents continue to not use any photos, and/or remarks. Whyzat you ask? They tell me that they want to physically bring the buyer to the listing and sell them on it.

They feel that too many buyers may dismiss a home because they don't like the color, the rooms look too dark, etc., in the pictures.

What they are living in is the pre-MLS days when buyers came to a brokerage and were shown only that brokerage's listings. That, and most of them are unable to upload photos OR type in descriptions. Many of them still use the MLS book...

In the last three years, most of these dinosaurs have "retired" due to lack of any business.

The absolute worst are where you're required to make an appointment to see a vacant REO.

Why do the REO royalty in my area use ALL CAPS in their descriptions? The more listings a REO king has the more likely she is to do it. Is this true in your area too? Why use all CAPS?

I actually don't mind that since it usually only takes a minute to make the phone call. I know when I'm doing my monthly reports and the client wants to know how many times the house was shown that month, I need that information.

Here's a comment I found today on a listing:

Main floor master w/ jetted tube, dual vanities, doorlest walk-in shower

Now, would jetted tube be something like you'd find at a water park? and the doorlest walk-in shower, not quite sure what that is suppose to be.

I think they mean a doorless walk-in shower.

FROG is common usage around here, but I had to think about some of those! And the first time I encountered "2.2 bathrooms" I scratched my head. No wonder buyers are confused.

Probably means doorless walk-in shower. So you must hope it is big enough to contain the splashes. Sorta like a horse stall with a showerhead.

2.2 means 2 full and two half baths. Who doesnt know that?

snip <2.2 means 2 full and two half baths. Who doesnt know that?
> end snip

*Agents* know that. *Buyers* don't. Used to be a house with two full baths and one half bath was listed as 2.5. Now with the advent of multiple half baths we have had to come up with new terminology. But no one sent a notice to all the buyers who have not been in the market for 10 years. And they are confused by that term, especially if you then start talking about Jack-and-Jill bathrooms and three-quarters bathrooms. Or the one I saw yesterday in the local paper: "destination bathrooms." (I thought *all* bathrooms were destinations!)

Bottom line: Jargon is handy if you're an insider because it lets you communicate quickly. If you're an outsider though, it may as well be Sanskrit. Smart Realtors realize that and smooth it over so as not to embarass their clients.

I can't believe some agent actually posted when children would be home alone! I think I would print that out, circle that remark and mail it to the homeowner! then they have a good idea whose fault it is when their children get kidnapped or injured (God forbid). That has to be the most irresponsible comment I ever heard of being made publicly. And I thought one agent here posting "back door doesn't lock, go in that way" was bad!

Panoramic view = view of all the neighbors upstairs windows.

Pool = green puddle in back yard with giant gold fish & mosquitoes.

Guest Casita = unpermitted garage conversion with murals of Jimmy Page.

Barn = 8X10 aluminum shed

Too many upgrades to list = 11 ceiling fans

Plumbing upgrades = noboby "went" recently

Upgraded lighting = mercury filled bulbs

Upgraded carpet = there is some

i have one...

"as featured on flip that house 6 months ago"

lol...made me laugh

It really bothers me when it's a new construction home and the agent puts - "ALL WINDOWS ARE DUAL PANE!!"

Well, duh.. you can't get a house finaled here without them. That is akin to me writing, "House comes with light switches"